11/21/2014, Ever been driving a car and run out of gasoline or risked driving with so little gasoline that the warning light went on? Some people seem to always be on track and would never run low on gas. Yet, others have run out and had to call AAA or are daring enough to risk it. What separates these two types of people? Maybe the ability to not get distracted, or the ability to plan ahead, or depending on the warning light to remind them. Whatever the reason, I believe that there are times on life’s pilgrimage where we all run out of gas or risk running too low that we need to stop & re-vitalize.
Lately, I have been running on empty on my pilgrimage to a happy life. Sometimes I feel like I am constantly running, that I am so busy that I can never do the things I want or sometimes need to do. This is odd because I live alone with my fur-kids. I am like 99% of the population in that there is hardly a day that I don’t go anywhere. When is the last time you had a day off or took a day and went nowhere, just stayed at home? When we do spend a day home, we always feel good being home — like it is a retreat or a holiday vacation.
In the past couple of weeks, I have literally been constantly running. For instance, On Monday – I got up at 8:00am & had to leave at 8:30am for a 9am doctor’s appointment, after the doctor’s appointment – I had promised to help my friend at 10:30am which took me to 1:30pm, then I had volunteered at an animal shelter to go walk dogs from 2:30 -4:30pm. I live 45 minutes from anything, so got home at 5:15ish to potty & feed my own dogs & cats, to turn around and have to be at church from 6:30pm – 8:30pm as people were counting on me to be there. I finally got home at 9:00pm…..I literally ran all day from 8:30am to 9:00pm. Yes, I got home inbetween some things to potty my pets, get my mail, etc. but I did so much running back and forth I was exhausted. The crazy thing was that looking in my calendar, I realized I had many days like that. I have been creating my own brand of energy draining chaos.
Then, things happened that stopped me dead in my tracks and made me realize that it is ok STOP, just simply stop, and restore the energy that has been drained. My 13 yr old cat, Eddie, has a lump that may be cancer. When the veterinarian said he wanted to do a lumpectomy on Eddie the day before Thanksgiving, it took my breath away. He will have his surgery next week. Eddie has no symptoms other than a lump, but the instant worry/concern over the health of my beloved pet made me realize that my constant running is not in the best interest of those I love, namely my fur-kids. The following day, my 2 1/2 year old hamster looked sickly, and I believe my hamster is dying. I realized that since leaving my husband, I have been the only human that my pets have to rely on. I do spend time with my pets; however, there will be no more crazy days of endless running. I will plan my days better to allow some “down” time or home time with those who need me & who I love dearly. Since the veterinarian appointment, I have slowed down – STOPPED, spent time at home, and now have the energy because of the love and positivity that I experienced simply by being with those I love.
My experience of running out of gas was my becoming severely depressed and down in the dumps. I did not want to get out of bed, put laundry away, or even cook for myself. In 2014, I lost my father, best friend, father in law, and uncle all of whom died. Now, my hamster & my beloved cat of 13 years may die too! Then, adding my divorce, unexpected house repairs, and then running – running – running. I was exhausted and never realized it until I STOPPED running. Slowing down, spending time with my pets and talking with friends renewed my strength to keep going and also to decide how fast my running will be in the future.
Sometimes it takes some tragedy or worry to make us realize what is important to us and how we have been acting or running. The idea of running out of gas & needing to be recharged by those we love and who love us can be applied to family, spouses, children, friends, or even pets. We, humans, are very much like cars as we can run out of gas, steam and need maintenance from time to time. For me, my mechanics are my fur-kids and friends. Who are your mechanics? Who helps you renew your strength/energy? Whoever or whatever renews you, it is well worth stopping and dwelling there from time to time.
PILGRIMAGE TO A HAPPY LIFE 